Do you remember when we were talking about vibrations? We spoke about negative vibrations and how they bring negativity around us. We are all aware of trolls, online and in life, people around us that make us feel rubbish or make us feel a low vibration. This can even happen in friends and family settings.
I have had friendships over the years that I’ve left an evening with and felt negative and drained. Maybe we have family that trigger us and bring that negativity forward or maybe it’s a situation. I am going to tell you the most simple way to solve this. Because remember, allowing any negativity in, whether that being someone else’s or our own can break our own positive vibration with the universe.
What ever the situation, whether it’s me being angry or negative towards it, or the other person. I ask. What is the trigger? What is triggering me?
I’m going to give you an example. I follow a lady online, she is all natural, free birthing and a healthy living mum of 2. I agree with a lot of what she posts and some not so much. What I don’t agree with doesn’t affect me. Because I understand we are different people, we all have different thoughts, processes and lifestyles. One day she posted "being a working mum isn’t the aim, it’s a loss. The aim is to be with our children and grow and nurture them."
Now I know I spent 3 1/2 years of breastfeeding and I am so lucky to be self employed to work hours around Sully. But I still work a lot, and I pride myself on being a boss bitch mama. It kind of feels like it’s my armour against the past 4 years, it’s the strength I found and my greatest achievement how I’ve managed so much. But this post triggered me.
I started thinking, who does she thing she is? How can she say that? I smash life and I know I’m a good mum!
Whilst writing this blog I need to tell you that not all of my realisations come from myself. I have an amazing friend who sits me down and is my outside brain. Having someone completely level headed and unbiased can bring us back into reality so fast, and it’s important to rant and vent and find the root of the problem. That friend asked me why was I so angry about what another person said? Why did it affect me what someone else living their own life said about me?
So I thought. Why does it? And do you want to know why? It was because I would love to be an all natural, free birthing and a healthy living mum of 2. I’d love to be at home, home schooling and being a mum all day. But in reality I can’t. Number one is that my mental health would deteriorate because I am not good at not being in work, I need a million things going on in my head and to be rushing about. In a weird way it gives me me time, and I return from work a better person, a better mum. I also couldn’t afford to do that as I’m the sole provider for my son. So realistically my envy of this lady made me feel negative and bitter, when really I couldn’t live her life even if I wanted to.
We are all different, on different paths, different thoughts, different wants and needs. No one has power to bring negative thoughts into our minds but us. We have to regain control and know ourselves to be happy, because really where is a negative thought going to get us?
Someone once wrote on a website about me that "I’m a bad mum and Sully is a brat that no one would want their kid playing with".
At one point this comment hurt me. But really, my son is a star. Everyone wants to play with him, the nursery he was at was obsessed with him and anyone we meet loves his energy. A bad mum doesn’t raise a child like that, so that persons negative absolutely pointless comment couldn't be true, and didn’t affect me or my son. Yet this comment probably came from a whole lot of negativity built up inside of them, wasting time that they could be being happy and positive about their own life.
Moral for that chapter. Don’t be a troll and spend your time better, change the cycle, bring positive vibes for a better day for all.
I find re-reading books or listening to audio books really help when my vibrations are off. ‘Solve for happy’ by Mo Gawdat is my go to for a reminder of how lucky and happy I am, I also love finding readings online or in magazines about happiness, because when we have true happiness we don’t have room for negativity.
With love,
Naomi xx